Let Go Of The Outcome

This morning, I walked my dog in absolute perfect Memphis fall weather. I left my phone at home and was able to fully appreciate the beautiful fall foliage, my favorite aspect of living in the South. (That and the delicious Memphis water.) I will save climate change, and The Memphis Sand Aquifer, for another blog; today's post is about letting go of fear.
My debut novel took me thirteen years to write, edit, and publish. However, it would probably still be in a drawer (figuratively and literally) if it wasn't for my experience at a women physician's retreat in January of this year. At the immersive conference, TransforMD, I learned to meditate and also delved deep into my career goals and plans. After two days of intensives, I mustered the courage to tell the class I had written a book.
The compassionate leaders, Dr. Marjorie Stiegler and Dr. Jill Wener, asked me poignant questions. Why, specifically, had I not released it yet? I shrugged and joked, "Nobody wants an ugly book baby." The group laughed, but Marjorie and Jill probed deeper. They asked, "So what if it is ugly? What's the worst that can happen?"
I realized fear was holding me back. Fear of a bad outcome, fear of poor reviews, or worse, being mocked as an author. This was all ego and baseless fear. If the book was unsuccessful, why would it matter so much to me? There are plenty of books I do not like, and it says nothing of the author. It means only I'm not too fond of that specific art the author produced. Art is extremely subjective. Of course, some people will like it and some will not. I had to accept that to move forward.
I am happy to report, two weeks since launching my book, it's received numerous accolades and hit an Amazon top ten Bestseller list. It's a beautiful baby, and I am proud I released it.
For all the creatives out there: Release your art. Be free of fear. Do not worry about the outcome. Fear is doing nothing…but holding you back.